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Sunday, March 15, 2015

#Together: The story of being yourself

#Together the eight letter word means a lot sometimes, an entire lifetime. Being someone who has lived away from family for studying standard 11 onward, till the present times when I pursue my PhD I understand, miss and value it more now than the times I was with my family. Family, your own home, your siblings with whom you fight and your own room where you read till late night mean a lot more when you are away from it. Life has become so hectic that we do not even have the time to miss these things and go back to it frequently.

After the failure of my first hypothesis in the second year of my PhD, all I needed for for the second one to work. I therefore started working on it like a person possessed. I had worked for two years with no returns and the pressure of self more than anyone else was huge. I desperately wanted the project to yield results that would speak of the work. So in the process I forgot everyone and everything, even my mom's birthday and she understood. I was putting my best and that is all they wanted, for they knew that was where my happiness lied, at that point. I hadn't been at home for two years and not allowed anyone to come visit me. Both the events would have only wasted my time. Time that would otherwise was worth spending working, or so I thought. The results were fruitful too, we did get the initial success we needed. However at one point after those two years of work it got stuck. I did a lot of things , but nothing worked. Worked on a lot of suggestions, none worked. I wasn't able to think of a solution. In Science you are the creator, preserver and destroyer. I acted the later. Stress was building up and I couldn't think. I started feeling I wasn't good enough to solve this problem and all the years I spent into this training were a waste. With such negative thoughts clouding my brains, productivity was scarce. I was slowly getting depressed. I don't even remember if I smiled during those days. My best friend then suggested I go home and take a break. I decided to do it and getting holidays were easy as my boss was proud of my no leave record. He happily gave me a week extra when I demanded only a few days. So I packed my bags and went home. 

Mothers always know about the crap in life and the antidote to it. My brother is my antidote to all situations. She was clever, as soon as she knew I was coming and of course all my failed results (as they are the people I bore with what I work on the most), she got my brother to come home for the weekend. Our family hadn't all met at one time for three years since he got into college. We met each other separately and so on. This was therefore a very festive occasion for them. So I reached home, with a sad heart but the food laid out on the lunch table to welcome me forget the work blues and the tiresome 18 hour train journey. They had gone far into cheering me up as I saw my little bro (not so little now) was screaming with joy as he begun teasing me. He would just say nasty things, tease me and run away. We fought for all the food that was made, Shrikhand, Dhokla, Thepla and Undhiyu, even though it was ample. After a great meal and fun, where I had forgotten all about the stress, we began watching all the pictures and video's of things we did when away from home. My parents have the patience of listening to most stories endlessly. Mom however had greater plans, she opened our old family album which had pictures of me and my brother in our growing up years. it was so refreshing just to watch ourselves, the way we were so happy and stress free. The pictures were a great time travel portal which made me believe in myself better. I had come across difficult times before and this was just another challenge, one more to make me better, stronger. 

With that spirit we gathered for tea, followed by some more laughter and fight. We cooked dinner together and watched a Gujarati play which mom deserved at the end of all her efforts. The next day went similarly with lots of fun. My bro left the next day evening and till he was out of sight all we had was fun. It was amazing how fast two days had passed and how fresh I felt when with my family just in two days. The rest of the five days were spent with parents trying to spoil me and cover all the dishes I could stuff into my belly for I live in the hostel and a lot of wok lay ahead. I got back in a week's time (not 15 days though I had them, a work-o-holic you see). I was so fresh when I was back everyone noticed the change in me. Trust me on that. 

I re-looked at the problem I was having with my experiments. Did a lot of reading in the next week and with a fresh perspective after about ten days I had the solution, which I been struggling for, for past two months. Family and #togetherness with family does work wonders, isn't it? serves the same spirit of bringing people together by helping you find, rent, buy that house that brings families together. It also helps you find hostels that would give you friends for life. The site is extremely user friendly and quick. So don't waste time, find the space to nurture your relationship, start a new life with a click here :

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